Women’s Health, Fertility & Hope — When You’re on the Clock

Reflections for Women’s Health Week Aotearoa, 11–17 August 2025

In Aotearoa New Zealand, Te Wiki Hauora Wāhine, Women’s Health Week takes place from 11–17 August 2025. It’s a powerful opportunity to celebrate the physical, emotional and spiritual well-being of wāhine (women). 

While we celebrate this, I got reflective on my own health. 

July is my birthday month and this year, I turned 37. Last year, I visited several doctors and I doubled down on health checkups after having skin lesions popping on my skin. I got a blood test, skin biopsy, ECG, and cervical cancer test. I had a back injury which hit me hard and took longer to recover. This year I visited more doctors for preventative care for hormone support, liver and heart health and general well-being. I invested time and research into supplements that I take, and now I feel I got this! 

It’s been three years since my separation and three years since I realised fully, consciously, and fearlessly that I want to be a mother. Funny, isn’t it? How life rearranges your priorities. The ending of my marriage made my longing for children clearer, and that longing is still alive. 

I know I’m closer to 40 than 30, and soon enough, I’ll be on the other side of 40. The clock has been ticking for 20 years and more. Fear and burden of passing down my trauma to the future generation, kept me from this decision. And it didn’t help because I love children. I loved caring and nurturing my younger sister, being a second mother to her and my several cousins, working with kids for many years and absolutely enjoying it. 

It was a long journey through fear-mongering when I was questioned, criticised, shamed for not having children yet. Out of this fear, I kept going on dates and dating apps, when I was not truly ready and dating people who weren’t right for me — people I wouldn’t have chosen if the clock was just turned off. 

No wonder more women struggle with generalised anxiety as we’re constantly caught in a culture of urgency, where everything feels like it needs to be done now. This relentless pace created a sense of “do or die” around even the simplest things. I know this pressure well as it had pulled me out of the present and stopped me from enjoying the moments that truly needed slowing down to savour. 

And this is not a healthy way of living, so I decided to stop worrying about my age, relationships and everything that comes with it. I know what I want, I know myself better, and I know what values and family system I want with my partner. I am confident, peaceful, and less anxious about the clock now. Let it tick. I am okay over here. I will enjoy the now and when it’s time I will enjoy that part of my life too. 

I am hopeful, because women are becoming mothers later in life — some with partners, some alone, some with science, some with adoption. There is no single path, or no set deadline. Just desire, discernment, and the deep work of listening to what your life is asking of you.

If you’re reading this and feeling an ache because maybe you’ve delayed motherhood or have not found the partner you desire to have children with or maybe you’re healing after heartbreak. And you’re wondering if it’s “too late”…This is your reminder. 

Your dreams are still valid.

You are evolving. Beautifully. Bravely. Boldly.

You got this! 

And while we’re on the topic of evolving, let’s talk hormones. We’re well-versed in the menstrual cycle and the changes in body, mood, mental health, and the fatiguing pain, low blood pressure, and hemoglobin shifts that women go through. Just when we’ve finally figured out that part, and while some of us are nurturing dreams of motherhood, others especially in their late 30s or 40s are navigating perimenopause. 

I saw my mother go through these changes, and with the lack of information available, especially in smaller women’s groups or communities, it is often silently missed even when the struggles are real. Symptoms like brain fog, sleep issues, mood changes, and anxiety can creep in quietly and still catch us off guard. This transition deserves attention, compassion, and support.

Women’s health is not just reproductive health. It’s mental, emotional, and spiritual health. It’s understanding the changes no one prepared us for and meeting them with grace and curiosity. Let’s talk. Let’s share stories. Because women’s health is not just one week a year. It’s a lifetime of change, courage and connection. 

FAQs 

1. Is it too late to try for a baby at 37 or 40+?
   Research shows that many women can conceive naturally or with support well into their 40s, though risk factors do increase. It’s a good idea to consult a gynaecologist to understand your reproductive health. I’ve done that too.
   
   
2. What is perimenopause, and when does it start?
   Perimenopause is the transitional phase before menopause, often beginning in the late 30s to early 40s. It can include symptoms like brain fog, anxiety, sleep disturbances, and mood changes.
   
   
3. I feel anxious, sad, or confused about my body changing. Is that normal?
   Yes, absolutely. It’s incredibly common. Hormonal shifts can impact mental health, and shifting timelines or life plans are part of the process. You’re allowed to feel all of it, and support is available.
   
   
4. How do I know what’s happening in my body? Is it hormones, stress, or something else?
   Tracking your cycle helps. The Period Diary (PD Diary) app is a great tool, it tracks mood, energy, and symptoms, and helps build body awareness. Pair that with professional support like coaching, nutrition, supplements and medical guidance to understand the full picture.
5. I want to hear from real women who have gone through this experience.
   Of course. We run a women’s circle and hold conversations where experiences are shared in a safe space. Let’s connect to know more.

Let’s Talk

I’ll be hosting a special event during #WHWNZ this August. Follow me on Instagram serenova_coaching or sign up for my newsletter to join in. If you’re looking for personalised support to navigate life’s troubles – anxiety, hormones, stress, reach out via Contact Us or WhatsApp for support.