When we talk about “happiness,” we often confuse two very different, chemically induced feelings. The first is the high—that exciting rush you get when you achieve a goal, buy something new, scroll through social media, or receive external validation. This is a dopamine-driven feeling, a chemical reward for chasing or getting something. It’s intense and wonderful, but also temporary, designed to make you seek the next reward.
The second type of happiness is closer to contentment and joy. This is a calmer, more stable feeling of peace and well-being, often associated with serotonin. It’s not a peak high; it’s a deep, quiet sense that life is good, you are safe, and you are connected to others. This is the lasting happiness that comes from acceptance, gratitude, and balance, rather than the constant pursuit of more.
Reflecting on one of my favorite movies, The Pursuit of Happyness, through an analytical and philosophical lens, it becomes much more than a story about success. It transforms into a study of the human spirit navigating the tension between hope and hardship, purpose and pain.
Chris Gardner’s journey, powerfully portrayed by Will Smith, unfolds as an existential inquiry: What does it truly mean to be happy? And what happens when society ties that happiness to achievement, money, and external validation? The film’s narrative mirrors the inner struggle of a man caught between survival and transcendence. In many ways, Gardner represents the modern seeker, one who confronts suffering not as a punishment, but as an opportunity for awakening.
From a philosophical perspective, the film echoes Stoic principles—particularly Epictetus’s idea that “It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.” Gardner’s refusal to surrender to despair reveals the power of agency and inner freedom even when outer circumstances collapse.
In another sense, the film invites us to question the very premise of pursuit. If happiness is constantly chased, does it remain forever distant? Perhaps, as the story subtly suggests, happiness is not something to pursue, but something to notice: in fleeting smiles, shared love, and the quiet spaces between moments.
When Gardner finally lands the job that changes his life, the quiet tears he sheds aren’t about triumph. They are about relief, gratitude, and presence. It’s a cinematic moment that collapses the illusion of pursuit and opens the space for being. This film reminds us that lasting happiness begins not when life is perfect, but when we learn to be at peace with what is. Contentment arises from alignment, not solely from attainment. Because life is funny that way; you may not always land the dream job you want, but you will often receive “what you need.”
“The purpose of life is to be happy.” When the Dalai Lama said those words, he probably didn’t mean endlessly scrolling for dopamine hits or working yourself to exhaustion just to feel accomplished for five minutes. Yet, that’s where many of us end up.
We live in a world that equates happiness with success, achievement, and constant excitement. Alcohol, nicotine, social media, sugar, and winning an award can all provide that fleeting rush of dopamine, the brain’s reward molecule. It gives you that spark, that thrill, that little hit of “Yes, I did it.” But what goes up must come down. And when the high fades, we crave more.
Dopamine is essential for motivation and goal pursuit. The problem begins when our entire sense of worth depends on it. When mixed with adrenaline, our stress hormone, it creates a highly stimulating cocktail—the kind that fuels overworking, constant scrolling, and confusing busyness with purpose. It’s the same mix that drives hustle culture and burnout.
I remember this cycle vividly. When I lived in New Zealand, I was constantly “achieving.” I hustled, working full-time and burning out within six months. Simultaneously, I was learning yoga, training, building my business, and pursuing certifications—telling myself I was expanding. But what I was really doing was chasing that next dopamine rush to feel seen and valuable, masking an internal sense of not being enough.
Then one day, I hit a wall. My body was fatigued, my anxiety at its worst, and the stillness I’d been avoiding finally caught up to me. That’s when I began to understand that happiness built only on achievement is fragile—like trying to fill a leaking bucket.
That’s when I learned about serotonin and oxytocin—the quieter, steadier hormones.
Serotonin stabilizes your mood. It’s released when you’re in sunlight, when you meditate, or when you simply accept yourself—not for doing more, but for just being.
Oxytocin, the bonding hormone, is released when you hug someone you trust, spend time with family, or even when you sing with others. It’s that deep sense of connection—a feeling I rediscovered when I moved back to India after years abroad, sitting with my family over chai and feeling rooted again.
Together, these chemicals don’t spike and crash like dopamine. They teach your nervous system that it’s safe to rest, to trust, and to belong.
We’ve been told to chase happiness, as if it’s some ultimate level you unlock when life finally lines up. But joy? Joy is different. It’s not a peak you climb to. It’s a rhythm, a quiet, grounded vibe that hums underneath the chaos. Joy is cooking a meal and actually tasting it. It’s walking without your headphones once in a while. It’s sipping your coffee slowly instead of surviving on caffeine fumes. It’s the sunset you watch without needing to post it.
Happiness is often loud; joy is steady. One can depend on something going right; the other just… is.
This is where I found Eckhart Tolle’s The Power of Now, a profound guide to practicing presence. I’ve read it several times to truly understand and integrate its meaning into my daily life. Tolle encourages us to transcend the incessant chatter of the mind and anchor ourselves in the only moment that truly exists: the present. We are reminded that we are not our feelings, our thoughts, or our mind.
What Tolle describes as liberation from the “pain-body” and the “tyranny of time” finds echoes in concepts like equanimity—that serene, unshakeable calm that philosophers have long celebrated. It’s the ability to meet life’s fleeting joys and inevitable sorrows with a steady, non-reactive mind, neither clinging to the good nor resisting the bad.
Similarly, psychologists might refer to this capacity as operating within our “window of tolerance.” This is the optimal zone where we can remain present, aware, and responsive to life’s ebbs and flows without being overwhelmed into states of panic, anxiety, or hyperarousal, or conversely, shutting down into numbness, dissociation, or hypoarousal.
By consciously choosing to inhabit the now, we cultivate an inner sanctuary of peace regardless of external circumstances. In this inner stillness, we can observe thoughts and emotions without being consumed by them. This isn’t about ignoring problems, but about approaching them from a place of clarity and calm, empowering us to respond skillfully rather than react impulsively.
In simple terms: It’s not about feeling good all the time. It’s about being okay most of the time, even when life isn’t perfect. And that’s where true peace lives.
So what should we do? Start small. Notice what nourishes calm instead of excitement. Build habits that release serotonin instead of constantly spiking dopamine.
Each of us is capable of experiencing lasting joy, peace, and contentment. Often, you’ll find it in the gap—between two breaths, two words, two reels, two ticks of the clock. Be aware of that space. That’s where joy lives.
If you are keen to explore more, you may find this blog interesting: Detachment: Ancient Wisdom from the Bhagavad Gita to Apply in Modern Life
Tired of chasing the next high and ready to feel truly content with what you already have, Serenova Coaching can help. We blend neuroscience, mindfulness, and trauma-informed coaching to guide you from chaos to calm, from burnout to joy. Book a call today to learn how you can start feeling happy with what you have, not just when something happens.
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Dopamine drives reward and motivation—it’s what makes you chase goals and feel excitement. Serotonin, on the other hand, creates contentment and stability. Too much dopamine chasing leads to burnout, while healthy serotonin levels promote lasting peace and satisfaction.
Simple habits such as meditation, gratitude journaling, daily sunlight exposure, exercise, and mindful eating help boost serotonin naturally. Studies show that consistent positive routines and meaningful social connections are powerful serotonin stabilizers.
That “crash” happens when dopamine and adrenaline levels drop. The brain can’t sustain constant stimulation, so after the high, you experience fatigue or emptiness. This is why balance of rest, nourishment, and grounding is essential for long-term emotional health.
Oxytocin, often called the “love hormone,” enhances feelings of trust, empathy, and belonging. It’s released during social bonding, hugs, laughter, and acts of kindness. Research shows that oxytocin strengthens emotional resilience and improves relationship satisfaction.
Yes. Mindfulness helps regulate the brain’s default mode network, reducing stress and improving serotonin flow. By training your attention to stay present, you lower cortisol (the stress hormone) and increase feelings of calm and clarity are key ingredients for real joy.
Uvnäs-Moberg, K., Handlin, L., & Petersson, M. (2015). Self-soothing behaviors with particular reference to oxytocin release induced by non-noxious sensory stimulation. Frontiers in Psychology, 5, 1529.
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